maybe i did overreact, but i certainly do not like it when one's wrongs are made to seem like they're mine. tsk tsk. *wags finger*

aniwaes, worked almost a full shift today. did opening at tiong bahru before heading to jelita to do closing. it's been a while since i worked there, so it was kind of an endearing feeling when a middle-aged couple recognised me from having worked there ages ago. they asked me how i've been, and where i've been gone to. so i replied by asking how did they recognised me and all, and they mentioned that i had served them many times before, thus they could easily remember me. well, i hope that implied an indication that i did serve them well enough to stick in their memories i guess. haha.. out of it all, it was a nice surprise la to me, for their little gesture demonstrated a form of recognition to us workers in the store. customers like these make my day. not the nasty ones though. aplenty out there, especially the ones with the thick fat wallets coupled with a stinking ya-ya attitude.

im in a wee bit of a dilemma. should i go for a holiday getaway, or attempt to go for my class 2A licence? its one or the other, due to my infinitely limited funds, and im quite torn in between. how aye..?

in no random order, these things worry me:

1. the amount and consistency in which i eat.

2. how i still remain thin in spite of that. i cant seem to put on weight.

3. my lack of savings. what i earn is what i spend.

4. how i dont look my age. some people think im still in my late teens.

5. the increasing distance i have with my used-to-be-close friends.

6. understanding what goes on in the missus' mind.

7. my room being in a stage of perpetual mess.

8. my lack of piousness. 5 times a day just seems so difficult.

9. what to do after i graduate. teaching? police? private sector?

10. manchester united being a spent force.

i heard this somewhere...

"the best intentions are the ones fraught with disappointment".

how apt.

it's about time that i update this blog of mine. i have been busy, and too caught up with work. my creative juices arent flowing anymore, just dont have any idea of what to blog or muse about. kinda realise that my life's pretty mundane, centrally revolving around the same old basic stuffs which tend to keep appearing each time i type. im fascinated by people who can write seriously good articles, which makes the mind think, and not just ramblings of the sort that im guilty of myself. should check this fella's page out, alfian saat. especially his earlier postings. simply brilliant.

alfian.diaryland.com

aniwaes, there was finally closure on the traffic summons that i got last january. was told to report to the TP HQ at Ubi Avenue for an interview in order to discuss and settle the matter. turnt out to be not much of an interview. the officer kept stating and reiterating that speeding and accelerating is only when necessary, thus implying that i was wrong. the fine was reduced to 150 bucks instead, and my demerit points 6. whatever la not much of a difference to me. i still ended up broke, about 2 week's worth of pay down the drain. whole thingy was just a wayang formality it seems. grr.

people are going for holidays and im slogging to survive. i envy them. i really do. despite the fact that im able to live comfortably, there's never room for excesses or indulgence. whatever luxuries i have is such as my bike and laptop is largely due to savings, necessity, and luck. comes to mind the plight of my parents, how they have worked hard for ages, yet still can barely afford to ease up at this late stage of their lives. i showed my dad my recent results, and he commented,

dad: ah bagus pass. kau baik belajar betul-betul, jadi hidup senang. nak jadi macam abah kerja siang malam jaga pintu?
(good you passed. you better study hard, get a better life. wanna be like me work day & night in security?)

somehow, what he said stumped me. i seriously dont know what he meant by that, and whether it was a congratulatory remark or a cynical reminder. but im proud of him, for all the hardship he went through. deep down, it made me more determined to try and provide my parents with a good retirement as soon as i can. hopefully la ya.

i met rennie iskandar at west coast hawker centre the other day by chance. twas a nice surprise, bumping into an old pal. still as fit looking as ever. apparently he's now working at OBS. cool stuff.

ok, shall end here for now. am tired, need rest. take care people.

indeed, the female psyche is more tormentingly bewildering than the male ego. i think.

these past few nights have seen me indulging in nissin cup noodles after coming back home late from work, in order to satisfy my everpresent appetite. that's the only option i pretty much have, since by the time i reach home there's barely any decent food left in the kitchen. this aint good for me i think, especially the MSG intake which will only increase the rate at which im gonna grow bald. thats the last thing i need what with the traces of nicotine that's already sporadically dispersed in my system. man i really am turning way way unhealthy. errmm.. help?

*phew*

alhamdulillah..with the grace of god i managed to clear all my modules. yes even that sucky science breadth. albeit barely. but whatever it is, im thankful. one less worry for me. hope everyone out there did at least fine, if not well. dont be too depressed if it aint the results that was hoped for la, life still has to go on and there's still time to recover the lost ground. things will come good.

i hate being torn into a moral dilemma. one way or the other i'd lose out somehow. what a headache.